Wednesday, 24 May 2017

Golf Rules

A few days ago I went to a park that has a public golf course on one side of it, behind some woodland. I walked through the sunlit woods, now at their greenest after several days of heavy rain last week*. The birds were singing loudly and the tangled undergrowth, long grasses and nettles were waving about in the breezes, an ideal secluded habitat for wildlife. To one side was part of the golf course where the grass was a perfect sward of smooth solid green, closely cut, with not a weed* in sight, despite the proximity of the woodland’s abundant supply of seeds of everything except fine lawn grass. I went over to have a look and saw an oval bunker, half full of cloudy water with a sandy beach all round the edges.

* Omission phrase "las(t w)eek"

* "weed" Helpful to insert the vowel, as this is about "woods"

* "bunker" Hooked or doubled Ing stroke includes the K sound i.e. ing-ker or ing-ger. For the sound ing-er just add Ar stroke, as in "singer".

I continued through the woodland and came to another fairway, and wandered up the slope alongside it. There were* more sandy bunkers and, as there was no-one about hitting golf balls*, I went out a short way to look at the closest one. And there I saw it, a solitary lonely little white ball, sitting pitifully* and sadly in the water at the shallow end. So what happened up to this point? Was it left there and then got rained on? Did it land in the water and the golfers give up on it when they found it there, or use another ball? What is the correct procedure when it lands in a water-filled bunker? Later on I looked up some of the rules of the game and found lots* of instructions on dealing with casual water, water hazards, loose impediments and obstructions, various specific situations in which you can move, lift or replace a ball, and many other injunctions against interfering with its position, along with instances when it is allowed and necessary to do so.

* "golf balls" If you were using the word "golf" all the time, i.e. in employment, then intersecting the G stroke, maybe with L hook, would be more efficient. A new intersection is best decided on in advance of taking the matter, as clashes may only become apparent during transcription, resulting in errors, e.g. "There are new golf/government rules in force regarding safety on the fairway."

* Omission phrase "there (w)ere"

* "pitifully" Full strokes P and T, to distinguish it from "beautifully" which has a halved B

* "lots" Insert the vowel, as it could look like "masses" which has a similar meaning

As I looked back down the fairway, I saw some golfers walking up in the distance with their caddy trolleys in tow. I went back into the woodland for safety, to save myself from flying white globes and to get out of the way of their game, which they can’t really carry on with while a walker* is hovering around the edges. The little trodden track between the nettles brought me back to the main woodland path. The nettle patches were wide, thick and tall, and this brought up another question*. How many golf balls are lying in the nettle-beds, gradually becoming mossy and covered in debris? Can they be removed and placed elsewhere in order to* be played, and how much damage to the wildlife habitat would searching for the ball entail, or would it even be allowed?

* "walker" Derivative of "walk" so it just adds the Ar stroke. Compare "wicker" which is not a derivative, and so has W + Kr strokes.

* "question" Optional contraction

* Omission phrase "in ord(er to)"

I made my way back to my starting point, as it was nearly time to meet up and make our visit to the ornamental* gardens. On the way I heard, and then saw, two crows at the top of a tall tree, cawing and jumping around. Crows are big birds and they can probably lift up a golf ball if they really wanted to. Magpies collect interesting items, and if a crow did the same, what are the golf rules? The questions* are endless*, and I suspect that the rules will proliferate to cover every circumstance, especially when something out of the ordinary happens and has to be accounted for. We went on to see the flower gardens and all thoughts of golf vanished amidst the rose bowers, topiary, double daisies and wallflowers. (584 words)

* "ornamental" Upward R to allow the following joins, compare "ornithology" which has Ar stroke to allow its joins with the N and Ith strokes 

* "questions" Optional contraction

* "endless" Compare outline for "needless" which has full N + D strokes, which distinguishes it and also allows the first vowel to be put in clearly