Thursday, 9 March 2017

Misspellings 4

Here are some more commonly misspelled* words. Converting speech to shorthand all takes place in the logical and orderly world of hearing groups of meaningful sounds (phonemes) and representing them in sequence along the lines of the notepad. Typing out your notes is rather different, your perfect world where sign and sound match is replaced by converting each outline to a learned spelling, quite often more of a visual clue to the word, than an exact representation of its sounds. When looking up outlines in the shorthand dictionary, it pays to be diligent with the spellings as well, so that both skills progress together. When the spell check shows up the red underlines, it is time to practice typing the correct versions, and even plain old keyboarding errors benefit from this, in order to* retrain the fingers.

* "misspelled" Note that "misspelt" uses upward halved normal L

It can be rather difficult to fit all these words into practice sentences, so I have asked the effusive but reliable Mr Speller to contribute some pages from his inimitable diary, where one never knows quite what he is going to get up to next, but we are nevertheless glad that he takes the time to record almost everything that he does. He clearly works for a publisher of English dictionaries and has swallowed more than a few in his time.

Dear Diary, This fine weather has been a cracking start to the month of March, as during FEBRUARY we had A LOT of ARCTIC weather with CHANGEABLE conditions and ADVICE from the weather BUREAU to take precautions to ADDRESS the problems it was causing. Fortunately my ACCOMMODATION remained at an ACCEPTABLE temperature and the postman* could still deliver my CORRESPONDENCE on his BICYCLE despite the snow. APPARENTLY there had been some AGGRESSION between NEIGHBOURS in the icy conditions but I hear they have been ACQUITTED by the court and we DEFINITELY won’t be seeing a repeat of that or anything like it OCCURRING again.

* "postman" Omits the lightly sounded T

Last week* I met up with COLONEL* Smith who is well-known in the world of COLLECTIBLES for his interest in ACQUIRING carved plum stone KERNELS. He has written a book on ATHEISM and another on the SCIENCE of growing BROCCOLI and also contributes a regular COLUMN in a local magazine. The last one was a HUMOROUS account of the antics of the BELLWETHER and other sheep on his farm and their PERSEVERANCE in the face of a very PERSISTENT and FIERY sheep dog called KETCHUP who HARASSES them during their ODYSSEYS over the hills and HEIGHTS of the area.

* Omission phrase "las(t w)eek"

* "Colonel" Written as pronounced, ignoring the first L of the longhand

Work at the office has been going well and there is much CAMARADERIE amongst my COLLEAGUES. The CONSENSUS is that we are a COMMITTED team, DEFINITELY worth more than our MEDIOCRE wages, and that it would be DISASTROUS for the company if we were to RECOMMEND that the staff never EXCEEDED their duties and refused extra MISCELLANEOUS projects that take* up their lunch breaks. However, after our almost SACRILEGIOUS remarks on being paid a positively MEDIEVAL wage, we were EXHILARATED to discover that our hard work and DISCIPLINE, carried out so SINCERELY and without PREJUDICE, has MYSTERIOUSLY come under the JUDGMENT of the chief accountant. He ordered an IMMEDIATE pay rise for all PERSONNEL which will bring an end to our financial EMBARRASSMENT and gives us confidence that BASICALLY everything would now be ALL RIGHT in our personal lives.
* "take" Insert the vowel, because as this is a narrative "took" could also make sense, but generally this common word would not need a vowel written in

On WEDNESDAY I had dinner at the MILLENNIUM Restaurant with SERGEANT Jones, the uncle of my DECEASED aunt, who died from eating a DISEASED fruit. He was a PROFESSOR of MATHEMATICS, which in England is known as MATHS for short and in the United States as MATH. He eventually became PRINCIPAL of the college. He had a FASCINATION with weight training and had invented a DEVICE to improve the DUMBBELL and other EQUIPMENT. However one day he MISGAUGED the weights, DECEIVED himself over his strength and hurt his back and so began a DESCENT into DISASTER filled circumstances. Over our coffee and a delicious RASPBERRY and PUMPKIN pie, I ADVISED him to take the ADVICE of his doctor and resume his former career in the JEWELLERY trade and in future be more JEALOUS to take SPECIAL care of his health. Finally we RECEIVED* the restaurant RECEIPT and we concluded our FRIENDLY afternoon LIAISON.

* Omission phrase "we (re)ceived"

I was pleased to RECEIVE a letter from a PLAYWRIGHT* friend of mine, who has written a book on the PRINCIPLES of stage production, with a guide to PRONUNCIATION, RHYTHM and the comic use of RHYME. For those who feel they PREFER this type of career, he has included a QUESTIONNAIRE* at the back to give them a THOROUGH understanding of the trade. He said that THEY’RE not going to get far unless THEIR enquiries are PRECEDED by a CONSCIENTIOUS study of the subject. He said that BUILDING YOUR library of information is the only way to PROCEED if YOU’RE interested in this PROFESSION. He states IT’S not rocket SCIENCE or NUCLEAR physics, and informing oneself* is the best way* to INOCULATE* oneself* against ITS disappointments.

* "playwright" The "wright" is related to "work/wrought" and means a worker/maker/builder, avoid the misspelling using "-write"

* "questionnaire" Note the outline for "questioner" omits the circle vowel

* Omission phrases "wu(n)self"  "bes(t) way"

* "inoculate" Strictly speaking it is the halved L that should be resting on the line, but it is more sensible to let the N sit on the line rather than lowering it slightly, as it begins the outline

Recently the firm’s medical ADVISER* and health COUNSELLOR* both advised me to take a break, and this was endorsed by COUNCILLOR* Brown. So the end of the month saw me CEASE from my labours in the office and SEIZE the opportunity to take a SIZEABLE chunk of my holiday entitlement on my YACHT on the high seas. It was quite NECESSARY after all my hard work and UNNECESSARY to stay in the office. Mr Green will be AVAILABLE to stand in for me, and I will have a whole month entirely UNAVAILABLE to answer emails. I have decided to LOOSE the bonds of business life and LOSE myself in the pleasures of sea, sun, sand and SANDALS. I BELIEVE I can manage without emails but cannot GUARANTEE that I will not ACCIDENTALLY view one or two* on the phone. I will sail to FOREIGN shores and spend my LEISURE hours on the beaches. I hope* to OCCASIONALLY write more in my diary whenever there is an OCCURRENCE of something NOTICEABLE, a habit which is highly RECOMMENDED. (1015 words)

* "adviser" This is the correct spelling, although the (formerly) erroneous "advisor" is gaining ground

* "counsellor" is a person who gives counsel/advice

* "councillor" is someone who is a member of a council/administrative group

* Omission phrases "one (or) two"  "I (h)ope"